I might be the only person saddened more than disgusted in the continuing stories of Tiger Woods and SC Governor Mark Sanford. Don’t get me wrong, I’m hacked that they’ve done what they’ve done, and that they’d still be caught up in it if not for the “oops, they found out” scenarios. Their confessions are not much more than p.r. spin to save face… more than actual apologies to save marriages.
The romantic in me realizes that the saddest thing isn’t getting caught, but that after these things have come to light, our collective mindset goes for the jugular faster than wishing the best for all involved. We want to assert moral superiority, even as families deal with tragedies brought upon them by the men who are supposed to be protector and provider.
I’m all for justice, but not at the expense of grace and mercy, too. Reconciliation is difficult enough without us all wanting some accompanying retribution, too. We’re more about karma than real forgiveness. And it plays out on Twitter, the evening news and late night opening monologues.
In the midst of it, these two families are working through severe upheavals in relationship, in life processes. And in thousands of other homes today, the same thing unfolds – and we’ve given up hope that anything can ever be restored…
All that to say: I’m sad for the moms that have to deal with idiot dads, for dads who have to deal with idiot moms, and the kids who get covered in all the crappy fallout.
Where’s the hope?
In fairness, I hope for contrition behind closed doors. I hope for forgiveness that brings not only repentence but also renewed love and respect for each other. There’s always hope – we just forget that it’s not a punchline.