what if we’re wrong

It's a long holiday weekend, and I can speak for everyone I know – we need it. It's a good holiday, Memorial Day, remembering those who have gone before us, remembering sacrifices and lives lost. But really, I think we collectively need a break – a Monday with no alarm clock might be the best thing in the world for our ailing economy right now. I'd like to think those battles and wars were fought over more meaningful stuff than our "right" to build massive IMG_0518amounts of debt and stress, and for that reason, I plan on resting, stretching, remembering, and being extremely thankful that there is more to this life, to this world, to this existence than me-myself-and-I.

Vicki's going out tonight with friends for a girls' night out, and I'll be home making pancakes for the kids. It's not a school night, so we might just go wild and watch all kinds of Spongebob Squarepants. Or instead, I'll let them control the remote – I know, dangerous!! – and I'll kick back with a book. I'm starting The Great Bridge today in honor of the birthday of the Brooklyn Bridge. Either way, it's nice knowing that we don't have to get up and get out in the morning.

IMG_0522Meanwhile, there's a thought that's been mulling through the overgrown forest of my contemplative head the past little while. Wow, that's a really vague and unclear sentence, isn't it? It has to do with what are we doing, why are we here, and what if we've missed out on the best by seeking after "good enough"? A Twitter friend tossed out a question last night that boiled down to this: have you decided to live according to the desires of the flesh, or have you given in to the calling to preach the gospel? My initial response, confessing here for both of you reading, was what can that possibly mean?, and I confess again that I was sleepy, sickly and probably should not have taken on a 140-char/response exchange like that. But I my mind was clear, and the thought I tried to convey was that too often, those two things are not mutually exclusive. We can take up the mantle of the message of the cross, and all too easily we can at the same time and in the same motion and, I think, with the same motives and reasoning, be giving in to the desires of our own flesh. There might not be anything more selfish than, wow, I'm following God and not going to hell – woo hoo.

Hence the subject line above, what if we're wrong. Because I think the gist of the original question is that the answer is probably moot, at least from the perspective I'm on at this time. Are you going to give up the flesh and follow Christ? Well, if you say yes, it means maybe haven't – maybe it means that there's stuff going on that's still holding you back from that kind of a trust relationship. If you pause and consider the cost, you might be closer than you realize. And if you say yes – well, if you really have done it, the question of "sacrifice" is gone because, I think, you've reached a place where there really was no sacrifice in the first place. I don't think I'm doing a good job defining terms and creating a point here, but essentially if I haven't, I don't know what it is. And if I have, then I know full well and it wasn't as much of a loss as first considered.

I need coffee with the pancakes tonight. Can see that now.

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